blake caden laurence
impulse-control disorders ,
junior level 2
dating alliya lynn andrews
Posts: 19
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Post by blake caden laurence on Jul 22, 2011 11:45:00 GMT -5
previous postsblake hated this constant feeble attempt on getting alliya to just...hell he didn't know what he was trying to do. he was just doing everything he could to find a way to get over this, but it wasn't working. every single moment that he stayed in this room with her and watched her cry, made him feel horrible like all of this was his fault. but deep down he knew it wasn't, he didn't do anything wrong. he didn't push her away and give her a reason to cheat on him, no he was innocent. alli did this to herself, she lost his trust the moment she went and did what she did. hell she lost his trust just going to the kid’s room to begin with.
though watching her cry like that and flinching. she flinched at him. he had always, always kept his anger in check around her. hell, he never had a reason to be pissed off at her, and he didn't know how much it could hurt. he was angry, sad and all he could think about was alliya and not hurting her. though hurting her seemed to be the only way she'd learn that she hurt him. she did the worst possible thing that anyone in a relationship could do and he could not just take her back. he needed that same trust that he had with her in the beginning, but that wasn't going to happen in one day.
shaking his head slightly at her words, he stared at her and all he could manage was a frown. he wanted to wrap his arms around her and kiss her and just believe she was sorry, but then what would that solve? it would solve none of their problems and he'd always have that doubt in the back of his mind. that doubt that she didn't really want him, really love him, or at least not the way he loved her .but her next words, they hit a spot really close to his heart and he knelt in front of her. placing his hands on either side of her, he just stared down at her, a tear rolling down his face. one small lonely tear. "alli...i don't want to lose you either," his voice was soft and almost a whisper. all the anger had suddenly disappeared and just left him tired and worn out. "but i just...i can't do this. i need time to think and i need time to get over this. maybe a small time apart will be good for us."
he didn't like the words coming out of his mouth, but as they left his mouth he knew they were true and that he meant them. "i need a break and it seems you need time to get your priorities straightened out." he felt another tear fall down his face, but it was like he was looking at a scene in a movie. his words hadn't exactly hit home, and he probably wouldn't break down until he was far away from alliya. he couldn't let her see how much she hurt him, because that would only hurt her more, and though he was mad, he still loved her deeply.
words: five hundred and thirty seven
outift:here
tags: eliza with alliya
notes: haha i wrote this so long ago and i'm just now posting it >>
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Post by alliya lynn andrews on Aug 3, 2011 16:02:14 GMT -5
  I'M THE NEW CANCER[/B][/size][/font][/size] •• N E V E R • L O O K E D • B E T T E R ••[/i] A N D Y O U C A N ' T S T A N D I T- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -When he knelt down in front of her she shied away. She didn’t want him to hurt her. He had just punched the wall so close to her, it scared her. She hadn’t seen him react like this. He was never mad at her, and she had never given him a reason to be. The only thing passing through her mind right now was Ian was right. He wasn’t for her. He was going to hurt her, and it just so happened to be this day.
When he put his hands on either side of her she flinched again. She was trapped. He could hurt her if he wanted. She clenched her eyes shut tightly, and when he spoke she shook her head. He didn’t sound angry. When he said that he couldn’t do it and that he needed time she shook her head.
”Please Blake. Don’t.” she said quietly. When he said that she needed to get her priorities straight she cried even more. She didn’t have Aaron anywhere on her priorities. She loved Blake. He was her priority. She spent all the time that she could with him. She didn’t like spending time away from him. She loved him with all her heart.
[/b][/size][/font] 206 WORDS | COMPLETE | BLAKE | OUTFIT
LYRICS BY PANIC! AT THE DISCO | TEMPLATE BY ARRO
POOR ALLI ):
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blake caden laurence
impulse-control disorders ,
junior level 2
dating alliya lynn andrews
Posts: 19
|
Post by blake caden laurence on Aug 4, 2011 11:58:26 GMT -5
blake had no clue how to take all this hurt, how to wrap it up and forgive. he couldn't just forget about it and he wouldn't just forget about her. he wasn't planning on leaving her forever, just a break. so they can both figure out what they wanted, though blake knew he wanted alliya. he loved her and that would never change, he just had to gain the trust he once had. watching her shy away and flinch, hurt him deeply. he knew he scared her, that she was afraid of him now. it hurt to know this, he didn't want to harm her, that was never his plan. he loved her too much to harm her, it was why he only hit the wall.
he had begun to stand up until her words stopped him, "alliya. i have too." finally he stood up and shook his head. "i need time to forgive you. i love you and i will forever. but i can't trust you the same right now." he cringed at his own words, he didn't want to do this, but he knew it was necessary. he also knew he was hurting her, and he hated that but he was hurting too. "i just need some time. time to think. please." backing away he frowned and turned his head away, "it hurts but its something i need. just let me have this one thing. its not much to ask."
words: two hundred forty seven
outfit: here
tags: eliza with alliya
notes: kind of suckish today
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Post by alliya lynn andrews on Aug 4, 2011 12:57:42 GMT -5
I'M THE NEW CANCER [/B][/size][/font][/size] •• N E V E R • L O O K E D • B E T T E R ••[/i] A N D Y O U C A N ' T S T A N D I T- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -Alliya didn’t think that she could sit here and listen to him for much longer. It hurt her just hearing him say that he wanted space. She didn’t even mean to. She had seen his anger, and it was towards her, and that hurt her the most. She didn’t want to hear him saying that she wasn’t his. She didn’t want to hear him basically say that he was disgusted with her. She hated this.
When he said that he had to she cried harder. It was really over. He didn’t want her anymore. When he said that he loved her she shook her head. She couldn’t do this. He was going to be like all the other guys and string her along, giving her hopes that they’d get back together but they wouldn’t. They would find someone else, show her them, and break her heart again. She couldn’t do it.
She pulled her legs closer to her and leaned her head onto her knees. He just needed time? But how long. She didn’t know how long she could do this. First Danni and Ian, and Ian hadn’t left his room in weeks, now her and Blake? Things couldn’t work out. Of course they couldn’t. When he said that it wasn’t that much she stood up and put her hand on the handle.
”Not much? Sure. We’ll go with that it’s not much” she said quietly. She didn’t know what to do.
[/b][/size][/font] 242 WORDS | COMPLETE | BLAKE | OUTFIT
LYRICS BY PANIC! AT THE DISCO | TEMPLATE BY ARRO
POOR ALLI ):
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blake caden laurence
impulse-control disorders ,
junior level 2
dating alliya lynn andrews
Posts: 19
|
Post by blake caden laurence on Aug 4, 2011 14:55:00 GMT -5
blake had the urge to stop her and pull her into his arms. he didn't like this, he didn't like upsetting alli, he didn't want to watch her cry. that wasn't his intention at all, hurting her wasn't what he wanted to do. but then again, hurting him wasn't probably what she wanted to do to him. but he was hurt and now so was she. he didn't want that though. he didn't want to see her in pain because she didn't deserve it. no matter what, he loved and her in pain would hurt him ten times worse than her cheating on him.
but he couldn't pull her towards him and kiss her, he needed this time. time away from her, from the constant reminder of what he loved and cared for. if after a few weeks, or months, if he loved her, he'd still want her. he knew he loved her and he'd get over himself soon, and that if she really loved him, she wouldn't hesitate to come back to him. he only hoped that would be it. that their love will grow stronger and not disappear all together. "its not. not really." he moved to his bed and sat there, placing his hands on his head, and letting the tears fall.
the numbness had finally lifted and the full blow of today hit him. she really did cheat on him, and now she was walking out of his room in tears. he was hurting her and she had hurt him. all of this ran through his head, and he didn't even care she was still in the room as he was crying. that was how hurt he was.
words: two hundred ninety six
outfit: here
tags: eliza with alliya
notes: blahdy blah
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