NATTES, aspyn denise

[aspyn denise nattes]

let's meet the puppet bby...

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``ASPYN DENISE NATTES !

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SING A SONG THE OLD MAN HATES
then you'll feel alive

»BIRTH NAME• Aspyn Denise Nattes
»NAME• She goes by Denise. Aspyn was the name given to her by her father.
»AGE• Sixteen
»PLAYBY• Ruby Aldridge
»GRADE• Sophomore
»BORN ON• February twenty-sixth of nineteen ninety-six.
»MEMBERGROUP•
Major: Body Dysmorphia and Anorexia Nervosa
Minor: Agraphobia, Erotophobia, and Coitophobia. She has also had a short run with self mutilation.

COVER UP WITH MAKEUP
in the mirror

»RACE• German and Latvian
»HEIGHT• 5'3”
»SCALE• ~110. Her weight will often fluctuate between the 107-112 range.
»EYES• Brown
»HAIR• Long brunette locks of hair fall gently on either sides of her face, parted naturally in the middle. Her bangs fall right in front of her eyes, but often blend with the rest of the hair that lay messily on the top of her head. When not straightened, Aspyn's hair has a slight natural way to it. Her hair frames her face nicely, elongating it and her features.
»DISTINGUISHING FEATURES• Aspyn's features are quiet long and thin. This could be from both genetics and her eating disorder.
»TATTOO'S• N/A
»CLOTHES• Due to her eating disorder Aspyn's cloths often don't fit her as well as she would like. Her shirts are baggy, often slipping off one shoulder. She wears a lot of vintage dresses and maintains a fashion that would be considered “hipster”. She wears heels, but often injures herself while wearing them due to her weak muscle mass.

I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING
a big smile on my face

»STRENGTHS• She is strong-willed and stubborn, she is a fast runner, high pain tolerance.
»WEAKNESSES• Never finds herself to be beautiful or pretty, lacks self-esteem, when people talk of their father she gets upset.
»LOVES• Listening to music, dancing, summer days, sketching, writing.
»HATES• Emotional pain, carrots, her inability to get close to people, medication, reading, group therapy.
»SECRET(S)• Aspyn can't remember her father. Not his voice, face, personality. She never remembers his touch, his smiles. It kills her on the inside. She doesn't remember him going to her school on career day, nor does she remember when he would tuck her in at night. She doesn't ever remember him telling her that she was beautiful. Aspyn's only wish is to have to father back – alive of course, but you understand.
»QUIRKS/HABITS• Aspyn knows what she needs to do in order to get healthy again, but as she continues to harm herself she can't let her mental power control her. When people call her Aspyn, she ignores them and refuses to go by the name that her father gave to her.
»PERSONALITY•
Aspyn is a handful. She is aware of all of her imperfections as well as those that arise from her disorders. She is also aware of how to correct these imperfections, yet her mind isn't powerful enough to stop the habits that have now become second nature to the young teen.

She is hard-headed and doesn't often open herself up to others for the fear of getting hurt. Aspyn speaks her mind and doesn't care if she offends anyone. She also doesn't do well with discussing her issues, though they do often come up. When she sees people staring, her disorders create a new insecurity about her body. In her mind, she sees her body to be much larger than she truly is. Another aspect of her appearance that is affected is her eyes. She finds them hideous and often tries to cover them with make-up, bangs, or even to the extent of keeping them closed and covered. To Aspyn, having people looking at her is one of the worst punishments.

Despite her outspoken outward appearance, Aspyn is a very broken child. She can't remember a thing about her father, whom died when she was only five. This is the deepest regret of her life. Aspyn finds herself guilty of not remembering the man whom she used to love so much. She doesn't open up due to the fear of losing another that she cares for. She is tired of forgetting those who left the world too early.

Aspyn never feels pretty. Perhaps this is a cause for her inability to connect. She feels too inferior to initiate conversation to those whom are above her on the social chain. Because of this Aspyn doesn't have many people who she can relate or even spend time with. She had a boyfriend once, but when the relationship became too physical she came across one of her phobias. She couldn't bring herself to be the least bit sexual. This aspect was devastating to her, and it brought upon another feeling of uselessness. She broke both her heart and his when she ended the relationship and she hasn't tried again since.

I TOOK THE CHEMICALS
we used to make our chemistry

»MOTHER• Megan Rebecca Johnson-Nattes
»FATHER• Robert Lee Nattes (Deceased)
»SIBLINGS• Jonathan Dean Nattes – Twelve
»BITTERSWEET HISTORY•
Aspyn's father was the fairy-tale dad. Her mother often tells her stories, but these only strengthen her guilt that she can't remember the man. From what she was told of his death, he was terribly disfigured in a car crash and died from burns after the car caught on fire. Ever since she lost her father at age five, Aspyn's life has been on a downward spiral. As she entered middle school she couldn't remember anything about the man who waited hand-and-foot for her. These few years gave her disorders time to set in and begin terrorizing her. At first she started wearing more and more make-up, something seemingly normal as a teenage girl grows. The feeling of disgust she felt from the sight of herself in the mirror was something she never shared.

When she was about thirteen Aspyn developed her first signs of her eating disorder. It started at skipping lunch, and easily thing to cover. Then she stopped eating breakfast, telling her mother that lunch was early and she would eat then. Eventually it grew to the point where Aspyn stopped eating all together. At that point, Aspyn was being hit with her Body Dysmorphia harder than ever before. So, without the ability to feel pretty by herself, Aspyn sought someone to fill that job.

When she entered freshman year of high school Aspyn had been in a relationship with a boy from her homeroom class for five months. The relationship was building in attraction and when her boyfriend took a step a bit further, she pushed away from him. Aspyn's phobia of sexual relations hadn't ever been put to the test, and with her reaction came more personal hatred. She began a ritual of pinching, squeezing, and rubbing her skin roughly. Somehow, the teen girl felt the physical pain to numb the emotional pain that came the many guilty feelings that were often roaming through her mind.

Aspyn's mother eventually felt that her daughter's weight loss was far more than just good exercise and healthy diet. After sending her to treatment for three months and no results, her mother decided to send her away. And thus, here she is. Her phobias are being looked through, her disorders dealt with, and her self-inflicted injuries monitored. She is suppose to be safe here, right?

A LITTLE LESS SIXTEEN CANDLES
a little more touch me

»CELLPHONE• Pantech Link II
»LAPTOP• None
»CAR• None, she has her permit but doesn't drive often.
»iPOD• A classic black ipod that holds 160GB.
»LOVER• None at the moment
»EX• None yet
»SEXUALITY• While Aspyn is afraid of any sexual interactions, she is attracted to primarily men. She is open to women, though, so she could be considered panromantic.
»CRUSH• None at the moment
»FLIRT• None at the moment
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[sincerely yours staff]