HUDSON, raven blanche

[raven]

let's meet the puppet bby...

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``RAVEN BLANCHE HUDSON !

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SING A SONG THE OLD MAN HATES
then you'll feel alive

»BIRTH NAME• Raven Blanche Hudson
»NAME• Rae
»AGE• eighteen
»PLAYBY• Valerie Poxleitner
»GRADE• senior
»BORN ON• September 12
»MEMBERGROUP• paranoid schizophrenia

COVER UP WITH MAKEUP
in the mirror

»RACE• caucasian
»HEIGHT• 5'5"
»SCALE• 100
»EYES• brown
»HAIR• long, sleek and healthy-looking almost black.
»DISTINGUISHING FEATURES• the contrast of her dark hair and eyes with her smile
»TATTOO'S• a tattoo of a gun on her left hip bone, a knife on her right wrist, wonderwoman and giganta on her back / side, "found in love" on her forefinger, text in german on both of her arms and a girl on her arm.
»CLOTHES• Her choices in fashion are very much comfort over style. It's common to see her in either a checked shirt, a band tee or a plain shirt with shorts or pants. Though on occasion she will wear a little black dress or something a little more flattering, she doesn't care much for fashion. Despite this, she's very much into make up and every morning applies eyeliner and dark eyeshadow to her eyes. She does this more to intimidate people (though it probably doesn't) than for vanity.

I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING
a big smile on my face

»STRENGTHS• she doesn't find it hard to laugh off an insult or to ignore harmful words - her being in her own little "bubble" means that she can block those sorts of things out. she can be so stubborn that she'll often get her way because people simply can't be bothered with her tantrums. she's very creative.
»WEAKNESSES• she can be destructive and violent when put in a vulnerable position. despite the fact she can brush off insults, when she does get angry she'll get violent and probably end up in a heap on the floor crying or screaming. she's often anti-social and would rather be alone and tries to get people to leave her, but when left alone she gets paranoid and will, once again, end up crying in a corner, too scared.
»LOVES• art, singing, playing keyboards, listening to screamo music very quietly, being alone, hurting herself and others, sunlight, watching other people cry, cussing.
»HATES• being told what to do, people not doing as she asks, not getting her way, the paranoid feeling of not being alone, darkness, loud noises, moonlight, cold weather, mirrors.
»SECRET(S)• the reason for her disorder, her fears
»QUIRKS/HABITS• pulls the skin on her nails a lot, chews the skin on her lips, scratches herself a lot, looks over her shoulder a lot, cracks her neck and shoulders a lot, has to move her legs frequently, sighs a lot, taps her fingers, chews her cheek.
»PERSONALITY•
Rae can be nice. She can be funny, she can be sweet and she can make a good friend. In fact, all she really wants in life is a boyfriend and a couple of bets friends. But it's hard to come by friends that are willing to cope with her constant panic attacks and often harsh behavior when she becomes paranoid.

She has panphobia, which is the main cause for her paranoia, so she can have panic attacks at any time. If she's alone when she gets scared in this way, she'll take to self-harm and destruction of things around her, particularly pillows and wood.

She can be over dramatic, but when caught in the right mood she can be calm and not take any offense what-so-ever.

She has not only a fear of the undead coming and removing her limbs in a slow and painful way, but she also fears disease and illness. This is why she has so many quirks. The cracking her neck is in fear of getting bad posture, the sighing in fear of her lungs collapsing or having a lack of oxygen, the moving her legs in fear of getting a blood clot, and several other things.

Raven hopes to commit suicide in the future, simply because she wants to be able to control her death, and die at a time that she chooses, not at a time that somebody else chooses. She does realize that this means she will have to die soon, but that doesn't bother her, since she's so self-loathing anyway.

She's very erratic and likes to vary her activities. She's easily bored and even more easily distracted. She can never focus on one thing for a long period of time and her mind wanders a lot.

She is very lazy and careless. She has so many fears but can't be bothered to do anything about them until they reach their worst.

She doesn't like attention, and it makes her feel on edge, but she has a tendency to draw it accidentally.

I TOOK THE CHEMICALS
we used to make our chemistry

»MOTHER• Jane Hudson
»FATHER• Cameron Hudson
»SIBLINGS• Lily Hudson, 23
»BITTERSWEET HISTORY•
Rae was the second child to be born, and was exactly five years younger than her sister, Lily. The two of them never were close. Even as a baby, Lily refused to hold Raven or have much to do with her.

Growing up, Lily took to ordering her sister around. She would force her to do things, even when Rae desperately didn't want to. Yes, Raven had the ability to say no, but should she do that, Lily would hurt her or punish her in some way until she eventually gave in.

A common activity that Lily would force Rae to do would be to watch horror movies. Raven hated this. She was so scared of them that she would lay away at night and get no sleep for days through fear. She'd wait until day time and then would finally fall asleep. Her parents greatly disliked this, and would force all manner of drugs down her in an attempt to get her to sleep properly. They had no idea that it was Lily's fault that she couldn't sleep, because Rae wouldn't tell anyone in fear of being hurt again.

Every day since her fears began she'd tell herself that on her next birthday she'd be grown up and all of her fears would disappear. I mean, what kind of nine year old is scared to sleep at night? The fear never went away.

At age fifteen she just could not understand why the voices in her head and the images in her mind wouldn't go away. She got in with the wrong crowd at school and started doing drugs. She thought that perhaps the drugs would help her - she was already taking so many that her parents gave to her. Unfortunately this often ended up in her unconsciousness.

Not too long after more abuse from her sister and her parents continuous desire to ignore their youngest child, she was diagnosed with schizophrenia, and was sent here.

A LITTLE LESS SIXTEEN CANDLES
a little more touch me

»CELLPHONE• just an old nokia
»LAPTOP• compaq
»CAR• n/a
»iPOD• an old ipod nano
»LOVER• n/a
»EX• m/a
»SEXUALITY• straight
»CRUSH• n/a
»FLIRT• n/a
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[sincerely yours staff]