so bittersweet by our design -open

[victoria hope jean]

life for victoria hope jean at hawthorne had been a bumpy road. when she first got to the school, everything was okay; she met her friends, a boy(which didn't work out at all), and people she didn't like. seems like a normal life. then, all of the things that made her happy took a turn for the worse her junior year. the beginning of the year, she was taken hostage and had to watch her friends be tortured, some even died. it would haunt her forever; then she dated alex, her first love; he tried to rape her again. she lost her best friends, gained them back, then met alyx and now she's happy. she was finally able to smile a real smile, laugh.. it was a nice feeling. she was slowly getting out of her depression.

she ran into a diner as the rain started to pour down. her nose scrunched up and she looked down at her now wet clothes, "great.." she let out a huff and looked around the old looking diner, before taking a seat in a booth. she ran a hand through her wet hair and looked up at the waitress that came up to her.

"Can I help you?" hope stayed quiet for a moment, not knowing what to say. she had to order something.. but she was scared to even eat. even if she was dangerously hungry; see, hope hasn't ate in a long time, but she was getting to where she could eat small portions sometimes, thanks to the help of her friends and alyx. she let out a breath before nodding her head, "um... could i get a small salad? with ranch dressing on the side?" the waitress took her order and walked off, leaving hope to her thoughts.

she bit down on her lip as she waited for the salad. she knew it wouldn't be long, because it didn't take much effort to make a small salad. she should have invited someone to come to town with her, so then she wouldn't be so alone. in record time, the waitress came back with her salad and she smiled up at her and gave her a thank you, before looking down at the food in front of her. it took her a few minutes, before she finally spread the dressing over the salad and picked up her fork. her mind was telling her to put the fork down, but she had to eat at some point. so, placed the bite in her mouth and chewed. a small smile came to her lips, she did it. she was making progress, for sure.

word count: four hundred and fifty four
outfit: click!
tag: open
notes: kind of rambled. oh well.

[valerie ariana lavelle]

valarie ariana lavelle, was looking out the window of the diner as water drops seeped down into oblivian. the seventeen year old was heartbroken. jackson henderson, had been a great boyfriend, but in return all her heart could long for was someone who was going to be married or maybe married. she was too caught up to even know anymore, but she still loved christian drew carver. the heart ached for what it ached for and serving as a best friend was the hardest thing she could do...now she had to go and be a friend to jack too. it was probably her own fault and the best thing for jackson anyways not staying with someone like her who'd always love and be crazy over another. she couldn't help but feel like she had failed. a tear strolled down her cheek as she looked back down at the pen being pressed so hard into one of her journal pages in her right hand that an ink stain remained. "way to go val" she said looking to make sure she didn't mess up the pen. she may just end up tossing it. she didn't want black ink all up in her bag.

a arm went to wipe at the tear and she let out a deep breathe. the world seemed to hate her or well at least the world she felt like she was living in. she tried really hard to make things work with jack, but now she couldn't and he'd move on to michelle or someone else and where was she back in the dirt. she had one friend who turned and became a complete bitch! hailey....and now she was dead, but she deserved it and she was well happy for james, because well she did something horrible...raped him and got pregnant. yeah, she didn't deserve to be a mother. neither did val. well in her own opinion. she was insane sitting there writing crap in her journal about life. which was what they were for but still. she heard the ding and watched hope run in. that was one person that she considered to be well nice.

she watched as the waitress took her order and looked down at her full tray of fries. they were cold now and she didn't want them. yeah she was going to try and force food down, but what would be the point in that her body was too sick to manage it and she should stick with simpler stuff. the fries were too much of a solid for her. she got her check and went to the bathroom really quick to check her face to make sure it wasn't stained with tears she didn't want sympathy. that much she was sure of. once she was sure it was okay she walked back out letting out another deep breathe before walking over to the booth cassually after she got done chewing she didn't want to interrupt he well taking a bite that was poor manners. "hey hope" she said softly and a warm smile playing up on her lips seeing as hope had a smile on? it was contagious? this would be nice and maybe it would make val feel better even if she had originally came to get away.

tag: krista with victoria hope jean
outfit: here
words: five forty-eight

[victoria hope jean]

i guess you could say hope was one of the more popular people around the school. she made herself known when she first got here with how sweet she was to everyone. she had no idea what had happened, but she'd turned into a bitch these past few months. she always felt terrible after she would say mean things, but it didn't help her case. she really wanted to go back to the sweet girl she was, but it was harder than it seemed. yeah, she had her moments when she was nice to everyone, but a lot of the time she let her mind get the best of her and she could be really mean. however, hope was probably one of the best friends you could ever have. she was loyal and always had your back. she would always be there for you, no matter if you've been in a fight for weeks. it's just how she was.

needless to say, she had a lot of people that she considered friends. mainly because she was always trying to make new ones. in a place like hawthornes, friends were what you really needed. her friends, and her boyfriend, helped her get out of her terrible rut that she was in. she tried not to egg people on anymore, she was a little bit happier, and she was starting to eat more. that had to be called progress. and it was because of her friends. not because of her counselor, her counselor didn't do anything for her. she tried her best, but how could a counselor help her when she had lost her daughter? she didn't blame her, but hey. atleast she could say that she was getting better thanks to her friends. she hadn't felt the need to cut, or anything close of the sort, for a week or two. so she was thankful for the people that she had in her life. she shook the head of those thoughts, because this was supposed to be her time; just time to relax and focus on herself, but she couldn't help but think about her friends. she always thought about them now, because when she went through that tough spot, she lost touch with a lot of her friends after halloween. her brown eyes looked around the diner. they didn't have much service, but she didn't see why.

taking a sip of her water, she let out a sigh. she should have came with someone, for real. but she didn't think about it. she thought a few hours to herself would be nice, but she was so used to being around people, her alone time turned boring really fast. she took another small bite of her salad, quickly swallowing it. there's no way she would be able to finish all of it, her stomach wouldn't be able to handle it. if she even tried, she would get sick. and that wouldn't be compliments to the chef in the slightest. next thing she knew, she heard a familiar voice. a voice she hadn't heard in a while, and she turned to look up at the girl with a smile, "hey val," she said, happy to see her with a smile on her face. last time they had talked, val had been going through a lot. then, they lost touch. so it was nice to see her face again. she motioned to the booth, "would you like to sit?"

word count: five hundred and ninety five.
outfit: click!
tag: open
notes: kind of rambled. oh well. sorry it took so long to reply, but you know i didn't see it! haha.

[valerie ariana lavelle]

out of the whole school val only really trusted christian, hope, riley, jack, and miranda. everyone was kind of just different to her. valerie was different herself and not everyone was use to her person, but it was hard for her to make friends here. she didn’t exactly start off on the right foot with people because she was claiming christian as her christian, but she held on to so much hope and she was just trying to be his best friend. she fell for game too easily and fell to easily into a lot of things. she thought hailey was her friend and she had imagined a life where her and her best friend could work out. she was a good friend or she tried to be but her head was horribly twisted and that little voice inside was tearing her apart telling her she wasn’t...she wasn’t worth it, but still she was here in this little diner and she spotted one person that she considered a friend. a total sweetheart in her opinion.

the brunette was really pretty in val’s opinion and she was almost slightly jealous of her. she really didn’t try and be jealous of people’s lives because she didn’t know everyone’s story but on the exterior she was pretty and on the inside well from what val saw she was pretty as well. the girl had made her way over and let her chew before talking and then hope said hello and she smiled a little bit wider at her. ”hi, how are you?” she asked and then she was asked if she wanted to sit. at first she looked at the seat unsure and then she slid in feeling decent about it. ”thanks” she said setting her bag and notebook down next to her and looked over to see the waitress removing her fries and heard her say what a waste. yeah it was pry true and well val took it to heart on a different level but tried not to let it show. ”looks as if we both found ourselves away from the south today” she said because they were on the north side. yeah, it was a weak little joke if anything but it was something.


”why are you all by yourself?” she asked realizing she could ask her the same thing, but val was more used to being alone she was sure. it seemed that hope was always with someone. isabelle, amanda, summer...someone from her recollection. not that it was supposed to bother her she just wanted a life like that. she looked out at the rain on the window and then down to her salad and up at hope again. she wasn’t fidgety just observing her surroundings. ”they make some good food here” she quipped to say more even though it was slightly a lie she hadn’t tasted the food to know herself. she had let it waste away much like most of the day and her lifetime, but she was trying to make conversation and not show her struggle with the whole jack and cc thing on her face. she wanted some happy time. she wanted some friend time and hope being here well it gave her ease of mind and possibly a chance at happy time. it meant more to val then she’d let on.


tag: krista with victoria hope jean
outfit: here
words: five forty-eight